I touched Paul Walker...twice. True story.

Okay, so no one thought I was lying about touching Paul Walker, but I still felt it merited a post. Here's the expanded story:


I was working at Cold Stone on Main Street in Huntington Beach one summer. I had only been working there for a week when Paul Walker entered and approached me. My sister and I had been fans of his ever since we saw the worst movie ever made, Meet the Deedles, and saw his abs. He is in that league of actors who do not need to be able to act, they just have to show a little belly (other noteworthy ab-ctors: Matthew McConaughey and Julianne Hough). As soon as I saw him, I knew I needed to find a way to touch him - not for myself, but so I could rub it in my sister's face.

Meet the Deedles!

I played it cool and took his order - two Apple Pies a la Cold Stone - and started mixing it. At one point, he had turned away, and I distinctly recall wondering whether I should say "Hey, Paul?" or "Hey, Mr. Walker?" I went with "Excuse me," which was obviously the breeziest option. I had a brief moment of panic, thinking I might be too swoony to actually do anything, but it quickly passed and I started mixing the ingredients into the ice cream. 


After the cones were made, it was showtime. He went to grab them, and instead of handing them to him like a normal person, I kind of rolled them into his hand, the back of my hand entirely touching the palm of his hand. Since there were two cones, I did this twice, passing it off as a totally normal way to hand a person ice cream. 


He and his friend sat and ate, and eventually his friend tossed some coins into the tip jar. My co-worker and I shouted "Tip tip -HOORAY!" Paul Walker said he thought we sang for tips, and I explained that we only sing for cash. Paul Walker jokingly said "Dude, take your money back," but then he tipped us a couple dollars and we sang this gem for him:

Heigh Ho, Heigh Ho

We thank you for your dough

We come to work and play all day

Heigh Ho (clink clink!)

Heigh Ho Heigh Ho Heigh Ho

You'd think that would be humiliating, but it just wasn't. 

The end.