Why Emily and Jeff are like Sarah and Chuck

Are you part of a couple who argues over whether to watch the action movie or romantic comedy? Well, if you haven’t checked out the show Chuck, you should, because it’s a great way to compromise and both be happy. It's got action, romance, and comedy all in one. The leading characters are Chuck and Sarah. 

While watching the show last week, it occurred to me, this couple reminds me of Emily and her husband Jeff. You’ve gotten a glimpse into who Emily is as a person, I thought you might like to get to know her married-couple-self. So I’ll share with you a few reasons why Emily/Jeff are like Sarah/Chuck, besides the fact that both couples belong in the OC:

1)   These couples can move! I don’t exactly know Emily and Jeff to be charging into danger on a regular basis. But there’s certainly a parallel between how Chuck and Sarah have great fighting moves and the way Emily and Jeff can cut a rug on the dance floor. Their first dance at their wedding was leg-en-dary folks. Legendary.

2)   Sarah is slim, tall, and beautiful. Emily is slim, tall, and beautiful. (well a little less so on the slim right now as she has an adorable baby bump!)

3)   Chuck is tall. Jeff is tall (Emily was not about to marry a guy shorter than her, so that narrowed the pool of potential mates significantly).

photo by zoe

4)   Sarah starts out working in a yogurt shop under cover. Emily used to scoop ice cream at Coldstones – I wonder if there was more going on there than I knew?

5)   Chuck is handsome. Jeff is handsome.

photo by zoe

6)   Sarah is very close to her dad – I LOVE stories about Emily and her dad – there is a sweetness to that relationship that I really feel privileged to both hear stories about and get to witness first hand [yes I am facebook friends with Tim Boyd, points for me!].

7)   Zachary Levi [the actor who plays Chuck] is also the voice of a singing Disney prince [in the movie Tangled]. Emily grew up just miles from Disneyland and is one of the biggest fans I’ve ever known. Jeff is also and actor. And if you heard Jeff sing, you might agree with me that Emily indeed found herself a Disney prince!

8)   Sarah is not a girly-girl. Neither she nor Emily are ones to over-share their emotions [foil to Chuck who is always on the verge of compromising a mission because they "need to talk"]. Furthermore, --SPOILER ALERT-- Her soon-to-be sister-in-law, Ellie, has to strong arm Sarah into doing anything to plan her wedding – she’s just not the kind of girl who grew up dreaming of that day and practicing it with little dolls. But, once Sarah gets into it, she rocks it – we haven’t seen the wedding yet, but I’m sure its going to be fabulous. (see my intro to Emily for more on not being a girly-girl) But it probably won’t beat Emily’s wedding, because that was one of the greatest events I’ve ever attended in my life. Really, you’ve got to get her to tell you all about it, it was amazing!!

9)   Chuck is an evolved man. He is big on sharing his feelings, communicating when things are going well and when they are going wrong. Jeff too can be very in tune to what’s going on emotionally both with Emily and the people around them. I think this comes out in his artistic sensibilities – both his craft of acting and his ability to analyze art he perceives. I also know him to have great courage for entering into difficult conversations for the sake of showing Emily he loves her and helping their marriage to be stronger. 

10)                   Sarah is a weak female character. Ok, you’re probably feeling offended for Emily right now, just like when people hear me call her “Pig,” but when I do that, I am actually calling her “Pyg” as in “pygmy owl,” which was her camp nick name and the name she selected when I asked her what she preferred to be called. But still, Emily is probably a little confused right now, because she’s never asked to be thought of as weak. So, I will ask you to refer to this article for a complete explanation of what I mean, (and some interesting food for thought). I’ll try to summarize: with feminism came a demand to see leading ladies that were more than damsels in distress, so enter characters like “Mikaela Banes” (Megan Fox), the love interest in Transformers. She’s a “strong female character” because she is a woman who can fix cars and fight aliens. But she’s a flat character – ultimately she’s still up there as a sex symbol, we’re just lulled into compliance by the manly skills she has. Sarah on the other hand can kick some booty to be sure, and she has more experience than Chuck in the spy world [parallel to the fact that Emily is slightly older than Jeff], but there’s more than one dimension to her character. Male heroes in literature have significant flaws they have to overcome to win the day, where as many modern day female characters are just there as eye candy. The writers of Chuck dignify Sarah by giving her flaws and difficulties – hence the term “weak” female character. She might be hot, but she is also working out her own stuff that makes her a true hero as she overcomes her own challenges. Like Sarah, Emily is complex.  You can’t just size her up at first glance. As you read this blog, you will come to know her and keep saying to yourself, “huh!” as she surprises and delights you with the way she reveals her own challenges and hidden talents.

Wow, I didn’t even realize how similar they were until I wrote that all down. In conclusion, if you haven’t seen Chuck, you might want to check it out. Also, you might want to follow this blog so you can get to know Emily (and Jeff) even better!

Movie Review Monday #2

When I reviewed King's Speech last week, I briefly mentioned that I am a movie prude. To clarify, I don't like nudity, graphic sexual language or excessive, unnecessary use of F-bombs in films. I'm totally cool with people's heads being blown off or other words being flung about though, so I guess I'm picky in my prudishness. I do go so far as to look at www.kids-in-mind.com, where they intricately document every bit of questionable content, sometimes to a laughable extent. (For example, in their review of Toy Story 3, they include this under "Sex & Nudity": "A male and a female doll rub noses together and hold hands. A female doll jumps onto a male doll's lap. A female doll kisses a male toy on the cheek multiple times in a row." Yeah, that's a detailed description of Ken and Barbie's flirtations. Scandalous. Consider yourselves warned.)


Anyway, all that to say, Bridesmaids put the toe on my prude line. It danced on that line by opening with a sex scene which ended up too silly to offend me. It flirted with that line by throwing out multiple F-bombs, but I was usually laughing too hard to soak those in, which is really my main reason for avoiding them. (I'm the kind of person who can get that stuff in my head so thoroughly that I could be telling customers at work to F off the next week if I'm not careful. I have the same problem with stupid, catchy songs. They come in my head and out my mouth. Partyin', Partyin', YEAH!)

Okay, now that I've disclaimered the crap out of this post already, on to the actual review:


Bridesmaids was the funniest film I've seen in recent memory. Top five things I liked:
1. Kristen Wiig, who played Annie, was her usual spazzy self, but she also had moments of normalcy and natural emotion to balance the crazy. She's not going to be nominated for an Oscar or anything, but I was surprised at her versatility. 
2. This is one of those movies where everything goes wrong for the main character. That usually annoys me like whoa (see any of the Meet the Parents films for an understanding of this phenomenon), but somehow this film pulled it off. You root for Annie, but it's not exasperating when she falls.
3. The friendship between Annie and Lillian (Maya Rudolph's character) is completely believable. Friends since childhood, you see that they have changed and don't technically have a lot in common anymore. But their friendship is still something they rely on heavily. It's nice. Plus Kristen and Maya are freaking awesome.
4. Golden retriever puppies wearing pink berets. Yep.
5. Melissa McCarthy. Wow. Look, I'm partial because I'm slightly obsessed with Gilmore Girls, but she was not playing Sookie St. James in this film. She was playing an icky, kind of manly, oddly kind, super bendy bridesmaid who willingly wore some of the least flattering clothing ever. It was bold. She also had an incredible monologue about falling off a boat and a dolphin that spoke to her soul. Or something. I don't know, but whatever she said made my eyes water from funny. 


In conclusion, I give this film a claw and a half up because I'd feel a little dirty giving it two full claws up. See it if you dare. 

Sabbath Sunday #2: Lonestar Relaxation

And the Lord saith "Thou shalt not update thy blog on the Sabbath." 

And Emily and Zoe agreed and scheduled an update in advance and will continue to do so every Sunday.

This week, I'm observing the Sabbath by kickin' back in my home state of Texas with a visit to see my family. I plan on enjoying some rocking chairs, BBQ, hammocks, fresh lavender plants, and the peace of the countryside. 

How did you Sabbath it up today, Lobsters?

Snapshot Saturday #2: everything's bigger in Texas

There's nothing like a Texas sunset. All that flat expanse seems so boring in the day time, but it inspires the dusk like some kind of miracle.

What is your favorite time of day and why?

Pulchritudinous Places #1: Sevilla

I spent the Fall semester of 2004 studying Spanish in Seville, Spain. This was an amazing experience for about 1207 reasons, but I'm just posting this to tell you why I love the place itself. Ready? Go.


Every day I passed beautiful, historic structures. Fountains, bridges, towers, cathedrals. Here are a couple faves:

That's the Triana bridge on the left and the Torre del Oro 
(Tower of Gold, an old military watchtower) on the right.
This was what I saw every day on my way to school.
Photo credit Jessica Anderson

This is the Cathedral in Seville. Some say Christopher 
Columbus is buried here. All say this place is stunning.

The people are beautiful too. I remember a businessman I passed on the way to school each day who always slicked his hair back and wore slacks and a button down shirt and...a Cookie Monster backpack. I remember thinking that it looked like everyone was dressed for a rockin' 80s party, and by the end of my semester, I owned neon, neon, neon. I remember the classy Spanish girls with their large pearl earrings, cream skin, dark hair, and coordinating sweater sets. I even found the man with the bottle cap glasses and highwater pants who paced the bridge and talked to a large invisible crowd beautiful in his quirkiness (my roommate and I dubbed him Don Loco). 


The things to do in Sevilla are also gorgeous and varied. While I was there, I kayaked, jumped off the side of a bridge into a river, toured cathedrals and gardens and palaces, saw flamenco dancers, snuck into a five star hotel and swam in their pool, went to an amusement park, took dance classes (yeah, I didn't last long there), went to a flamenco concert, saw a bullfight, shopped too much, ate a lot of food that was fried in olive oil, and even learned some Spanish. 


My only complaint about Sevilla - my complaint about Europe, really - is that there is no Diet Pepsi or Diet Coke. Yes, there's Coca Cola Light, but it is not the same. I gave up caffeine for the three and a half months I was there. And if a decaffeinated me can find beauty in a place, then it must be beautiful. Go visit. I command you. 

Evolution of Love

Dear Emily [and other pregnant Lobsters],

I’m so excited that your baby girl is on the way. In less than two months she’ll be here! I know you have a ton going on right now, but I’ve realized something lately and I wanted to share it with you. I hope it will be a little something in the back of your mind that gets you excited about what you have to look forward to.

I was holding Sofia in my arms recently. I was exhausted. My back was in excruciating pain from carrying her around all day for the past who knows how many days. She was squirming, so it was making it difficult to feed her. I was on the verge of exasperation. [getting excited yet?] But I felt this overwhelming love for her wash over me. I had no reason to believe she had any happy feelings towards me right then, but I didn’t need any. I loved her so fully in that moment, whether or not she loved me back. It was fine by me if our love was completely one sided.

I realized I’d entered a new phase of my life. Before she came, for years I had been in a phase of life that was about finding requited love – someone who would love me the way I loved them. During that phase, there were mellow dramatic seasons of singleness, wondering if I’d always be alone; relationships where the other person thought more of me than I thought of them; relationships where I thought more of the other person than they thought of me; and finally a relationship where we both thought more of the other person that we thought of ourselves.

I thought about how nice it was, to come into a phase of my life where even if this love is unrequited, I am not bothered at all, it brings me joy anyway. And then I realized, preceding the phase of searching for a love of balance between two people, I had been on the other end of this one-sided love. I was obviously a child once too. I know my parents felt this love for me because of all the times I was a twitt to them, but they kept loving me anyway. Their love was not dependent on my love.

So I’ve gone from fully receiving, to searching for a symbiotic give and take, and now to fully giving. I’ve come full circle. There is an incredible sweetness to this phase, and I can’t wait for you to taste it too!

Lurv,

z

anything once: sitting on a bench in arlington cemetery for an hour

My prior blog was called "Anything Once" and included my thoughts on new things I tried. I'll continue that tradition here. You should try new things too and tell us about them! 

A tip for you, lobsters: Don't go to Washington D.C. when you're eight months pregnant. It's just not that fun. Jeff's family was in town this week, and that was one of the trips that we took. It was kind of fun, but also rough. I am totally okay just walking, walking, walking, but standing still for more than a few seconds is seriously a challenge. So when we went to Arlington Cemetery at the end of the day, I knew I'd be better off just sitting on a park bench instead of trying to rush the group past monuments. 

I had no idea that sitting there was going to be so amusing. These are the things that happened:

1. Some people felt the need to speak to me, which was nice! I got "Nice to kick your feet up, eh?" "You've got it rough." "Mama got tired?" And a deaf man who was drenched in sweat asked if I was okay and said that his feet hurt.

2. Another pregnant woman sat next to me on the bench and her friend took a picture of us. I'm still wishing I had asked her to send it to me.

3. A college student with a knee brace sat with me for a bit. I asked her where she was from, and she said she was from Texas A&M, visiting D.C. with her Country Western Dance Team. No, seriously.

4. I heard approximately five different languages pass me.

5. Most of the children who passed by gawked at me. I'd like to think that in a few years, they'll look back on their time at Arlington Cemetery and remember the lines of white headstones memorializing our nation's heroes...and they'll remember my monstrous belly.

I also learned that if you serve in the military and are later appointed Supreme Court Justice, you are eligible to be interred at Arlington. And there are only two presidents buried there. (A tour guide paused near me.)

View from a bench

In conclusion, this was a peaceful, albeit slightly creepy, way to pass an hour. 

One of these things is not like the others

rancid brown goo

disposing of rancid brown goo

burnt goo at bottom of pot

what the goo was supposed to look like

Three of these things do not belong. 


Lobsters, here's a little thought about a good friendship: you have a nice balance of things in common, and things that make you different. While Emily grew up in a family that focused more on working out, I grew up in a family that focused more on eating. In order to have eating as a prioritized passion, cooking becomes a critical means to an end. I really love to cook. I don't claim to be any kind of expert, I just enjoy it. But all the effort I put into cooking the recipe you see above could not possibly yield anything I could actually eat. This was no "joy in the journey" kind of experience.

See how beautiful that last photo is (credit to Cooking Light Magazine)? Wouldn't you want to see that on your table? Wouldn't you enjoy eating it? It includes several beautiful shades of my favorite color, green, against the nice clean white of the rice and cheese. Lovely. Not so in my kitchen. 

The road blocks:

1. The recipe called for frozen shelled edamame, our grocery had no shelled option, which I only discovered at the point in the cooking when I was supposed to be adding the edamame. 
2. The recipe called for Arborio rice. I thought I could force a brown rice substitution. I still don't understand why I couldn't make this work, but this seemed to be the key downfall.  
3. Baby girl decided she was hungry about 15 minutes into the cooking process, so while I might have found some creative ways to course correct after the above two incidents, after a 45 minute feeding de-rail, it was just too late.  

So after about 2 and a half hours, I finally had to throw in the towel. Be glad the internet does not have a scratch-n-sniff feature (yet). 

The things I will take away from this experience to help me feel better about myself:

1. Respect the recipe. While substitutions can be a handy cooking tool, its probably the minority that are actually effective. I should have done my research. Lesson learned. 
2. Its ok if I'm not simultaneously a gourmet chef and good mom to a newborn. Guilt assuaged. 
3. Sometimes the best thing to do is to quit. My tenacity in pushing through adversity to make something amazing out of a seemingly impossible situation can be a strength that helps me to shine. In another light, this is an incurable stubbornness that gets me into trouble. There does come a point when you have to admit defeat. This was apparently a difficult lesson, as it took over 2 hours for me to finally give up. Self-awareness embraced.
4. There's a first for everything. Here's a little back-door-brag for you, after cooking for and with my husband for almost six years, this was the first meal that completely failed, forcing us to find something entirely different to eat. Vanity relished.
5. If at first you don't succeed, remember you can always get a blog post out of it. Laughter enjoyed.

Movie Review Monday #1

I just watched King's Speech for the second time this week. (You would think that immediately gives away my opinion, but I have unfortunately watched several films that I didn't like multiple times. I've seen Dude, Where's My Car three times, for example. Don't judge me.)


Top five observations:
1. Colin Firth deserved his Oscar. Look at what he had to accomplish with his character: Regalness perfectly blended with humility, a manner of speaking and behaving in keeping with the time period, and a stammer that wasn't overdone but conveyed the power of the story, just to name a few.
2. This is one of the first R-rated films that I felt was fully justified in its rating. The F-bombs were absolutely necessary to the story. Don't get me wrong, there are other R-rated films where the mature content added somewhat to the story, but I can't think of any off the top of my head where the mature content was completely necessary like this one. I'm a prude, get over it.
3. Geoffrey Rush is an ugly man. Uglier, in fact, than the real life dude he portrayed. See?

Not ugly...

ugly!

Fascinating casting, don't you think? The good news is that he's a freaking good actor, so you don't even think about Geoff's looks (I just decided to call him Geoff - did I pull that off?). He's endearing and delightful, a great father and husband, and a good friend to Firth's character, who is a difficult man to befriend.

4. There are at least three Harry Potter actors in this film. This is a strength in my book. One of those actors is Helena Bonham Carter in one of her least quirky works in recent memory, and she is still impressive as always. I would like to hang out with her and absorb some of her brilliant weirdness.

5. I love that this is a true story, but it's also somehow a fresh and interesting story. There was nothing similar to this film in theaters this year - a historic piece which focuses on a friendship between two grown men and the struggles of a leader. 

As you can see, lobsters, I give this two claws up. It was WAY better than Dude, Where's My Car.

Sabbath Sundays #1 Virtual Baby Shower...and Church!

And the Lord saith "Thou shalt not update thy blog on the Sabbath." 

And Emily and Zoe agreed and scheduled an update in advance and will continue to do so every Sunday.

This week, I'm observing the Sabbath by attending a virtual baby shower with some of my college friends (including Zoe, who planned the whole technologically amazing thing) who are scattered across the country. Thanks, Skype! I'm also going with a classic option - church.

How do you Sabbath it up, Lobsters?

Snapshot Saturday #1: cup runneth over

For me, photography is about my love for something welling up so much that I have to capture it or I'll explode. So to kick off our weekly Snapshot Saturdays, I'm starting on a more personal note by sharing a shot of two of the things that most make the cup that is my heart runneth over: my husband and my daughter.

How do you express yourself or react when your heart wells up with joy over something you witness?

Lobsters, meet Emily. Emily, Lobsters.

Howdy Lobsters! I’m Zoe, nice to meet you. Emily, thank you for that amazing introduction, and also, Holy Shnykies! What was I thinking allowing Emily to introduce me first? How am I supposed to follow that act? Fool of a Took, Zoe! Ugh. Ok. I’ll give it my best shot.

Per point 7 re: my curly hair, I would like to write this post as Goldy Locks. Do you find that too many females you meet are overly dramatic or underly interesting (yes I did just make up that word)? Then Lobsters, meet Emily, she is just right!

Emily is active, and yet, not so athletic as to make me feel miserable about my own un-athleticism. She’s great about finding fun ways to exercise, like line dancing to the Cotton Eyed Joe. 

Cotten Eyed Joe at my wedding
From left to right: me, Emily, Erin 

Emily is cool. She’s always in the know about current films/TV/music, she has a mass store of knowledge of pop-culture-gone-by, and for some reason I really want to mention here that she’s completely addicted to Diet Pepsi. She grew up in the OC, in the house of super cool parents, with an amazing talent for retaining knowledge. These three attributes formed a trifecta of cultural relevance. [side note: This post will list five examples about Emily’s just-right-ness as the first of many odes to one of our favorite pop-authors, Nick Hornby, as featured in High Fidelity.] And yet, she has never seen ANY of the Star Wars films, so whenever I start to feel like I am a grandparent by comparison to her teen savvy, I have little things like my familiarity with Ewoks to comfort myself with.

Yeah, that IS Jimmy Fallon kissing Emily on the cheak

Emily is a not-so-girly girl. This is a picture of our floor mates in college, all amazing women, most of whom we’re still in touch with and love dearly. But note the two of us are cowering in the corner, a bit overwhelmed by the overdose of estrogen. And yet, we’ve enjoyed late-night slumber party talks about boys, she was an amazingly supportive bridesmaid, her own wedding was an historic production, she has fantastic decorating skills, we’ve had overlapping pregnancies (boys can’t do that in case you didn’t know) and somehow she is one of the only girls I feel comfortable having a good squeal with (usually followed by laughing at ourselves for our girliness). 

Armington B309 - woot!

Emily is competitive. I’m sure you know this to be a really obnoxious attribute in some people. And yet, while Emily is intense about her competition, she doesn’t let it get in the way of her relationships. For example, she knows better than to play either ping pong or feusball with me. Ping pong because I could not begin to challenge her enough and feusball because she would get too frustrated when I beat her – best to avoid both all together. When we do play games together, she really gets into it, but she never gets mean. Her competitiveness also helps her to set the bar high – see her introduction to me as an example. She’s really good at a whole lot of things: trivia, singing, dancing, reading out loud, mod-podging, event planning, downing diet pepsi’s, catch phrase, spelling/grammar, writing, making people laugh hysterically, just to name a few. She also encourages me to be better at lots of those things by way of inspiration, and that’s a good kind of person to keep around.

Coolest wedding ever, starring Emily as the bride

Last, but not least: Emily is a straight shooter. Some people don’t have the guts to have a friend like this, and I don’t expect Emily is necessarily like this to everyone she meets, but I believe a wise person keeps a friend around who will be honest and direct. You need a person who tells you when your hair is a wreck; who shuts you down when your blog posts start turning into novels; who tells you that you need to work on being a better listener. And yet, Emily embodies her middle name, Grace. When some people give you the hard truth, you never want to encounter them again. When Emily delivers the truth, sometimes it stings, but I know there’s love in it and that I’d be a fool not to hang onto her forever. That’s why, even though we only lived together for one year, she’s my “Roomy for life.”

Zoe and Emily - not letting go

She’s just the right amount of active. She’s just the right amount of cool. She’s just the right amount of girly. She’s just the right amount of excellent. She’s just the right amount of honest. I’m not letting this gal go. Instead, I’m gonna let you share her with me, because you will all be better for it, Lobsters. You’re welcome.

Blog readers, meet Zoe. Zoe, Blog readers.

I love lists. You’d have figured that out after about a week of this blog, but I thought I’d be up front with you, Lobsters. So I could think of no better way to introduce my friend Zoe than a top seven* list of things I love about her. Ready? Go.

7. She has the most magnificent mane of curls you’ve ever seen. I realize this is a silly reason to love a person, but it’s true. Oh, I also love her freckles – does that make this a valid point? Ah well, at least it’s the number seven reason I love her and not number one. 

Proof of Points 7, 6, and 4

6. She makes pretty babies. Okay, she only has one. And this also seems like a weird reason to love someone, but follow my logic: Zoe is one of my best friends. Best friends share things like pictures of their children. Therefore, I see a lot of pictures of Sofia. I love that I don’t have to pretend to think she’s cute. Makes my life easier, you know?

5. She is encouraging. If I ever write a book, she’s going to have to be one of the top people I dedicate that sucker to because no one, not even my own super supportive mother, has expressed a desire that I pursue that goal more than Zoe. And that’s totally just one example of her encouragement.

4. She has a strong relationship with her family. I don’t know about you, but it makes me happy to see a friend who admires her husband (Dr. Manny Reyes, future professor of mathematics at Bowdoin College, guitar player, video game extraordinaire, all around great, humble guy), adores her child (Sofia Arabella, age five months, basically the cutest), and continuously speaks positively about her parents, sister, and in-laws. Not to say that she doesn’t have any problems ever with any of them, but I know that even if Sofia poops on her, Zoe still loves her like whoa. I guess in some way this makes me feel secure in our friendship too – sometimes I feel like I’m pooping on her with my problems. More on that later.

3. She’s smart. She graduated early from Westmont College with a double major in English and Philosophy, and she also obtained her Masters in Social Work from CSU: East Bay. And if degrees don’t impress you, just trust me. She’s intelligent every single day.

See? Smart. This is not a costume, folks.

2. She’s creative. She’s a writer (see post below for proof), a photographer, a pot painter (like a flower pot, not weed), a cook, a quilter, a singer, and a collector of salt and pepper shakers. I’m sure there’s more, but those are the creative pursuits I connect with Zoe off the top of my head.

1. She’s wise. Once upon a time, I dated a guy on and off for over four years. To way oversimplify things, we were not good for each other, and Zoe lovingly told me that we were not good for each other. Many, many times. I did not listen to her (hence feeling like I’ve pooped on her emotionally). After I ended things with him, I swore to myself that I would listen to Zoe the next time she explicitly gave me advice. Well, about five months later I had a huge crush on a guy in my office, and I wanted to ask him to hang out. She told me not to and said that I needed to be pursued for once. Kicking myself for swearing I’d listen to her, I did not ask him to hang out and figured nothing would ever come of the crush if I wasn’t the instigator. I mean, he was really hot and I was really me. But now I’m having his baby. You can fill in the blanks there and marvel at Zoe’s sagacity. Again, that’s just an example. Sometimes I feel like I have my own personal  therapist, and I’m thankful for that. I think a lot of this comes from her strong relationship with Jesus, which is also an awesome attribute.

Doesn't she just ooooooze wisdom?

I guess I’ll share Zoe though. You can be her friend too, Lobsters. You’re welcome.

*I could have come up with way more, but I didn't want to put anyone to sleep.

So no one told you life was gonna be this way *clap*clap*clap*clap*

I’ve been re-watching my DVDs of FRIENDS season 10 lately. Was I the only one who paid money for the whole Rembrants cd only to find out that this was the only tolerable song on it? Anyways, I got to thinking, what do they mean by "there" when they say "I'll be there for you"?

After ten years of crazy antics, but ultimately faithful friendship to each other, the crew disbands, the series ends. Based on the show, loyalty in friendship was supposedly contingent on geographic proximity. Can you really stay good friends with someone who isn’t your room or hall mate anymore?

10 years ago, I met Emily on a shuttle in downtown Santa Barbara. We shared a glorious year in our college dorm room, B309. But our friendship was really solidified when Emily went abroad to study in Spain. We were really good roommates, but we’re freaking amazing long distance friends. And that’s a good thing – cause everyone scatters after college, but for me, that didn’t have to mean losing one of the greatest gifts my college years gave to me.

Being “there” for one another has meant loving on each other from California, Texas, Virginia, Spain, Sri Lanka, and soon to come, Maine. There has been little about our friendship that has been convenient, but Emily has been “there” for me as we graduated college, got our first jobs, got married, explored career options and grad school, supported our husbands through grad school, and now as we are entering into motherhood.

Seeing as how we live in a time, which forces us to redefine “neighbor” in order to have any longevity in our relationships, I think its worthwhile to reflect on our friendship and figure out how we’ve managed so well. I want us to be there for each other for the decade to come. I want to see if we’ve learned anything worth offering to others. 

Who couldn’t use a little less loneliness, a little more support, a lot more laughter, and heaps more love? I think this is one of the great human projects: to figure out how to love each other better. So join us in this journey. Test out some of our tricks, offer us some suggestions, or just enjoy a good laugh. It’ll be good to have you “here” with us!

according to phoebe buffay, lobsters mate for life.

according to phoebe buffay, lobsters mate for life: