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| He's behind the fence on the right. He was kind of creepy, hence Eiley's obvious apprehension. |
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| There are few things I like more in life than a paddling of ducklings. |
1. Head over to the archery section and pretend to be Katniss, obviously.
2. Count rednecks. I only got up to seven and then forgot about this little game, but those seven were defined by camouflage t-shirts, unruly facial hair, and intensely sunburnt cheeks. How do you define a redneck? (Please, keep Foxworthy quotes to a none.)
3. Marvel at the products I never knew existed, such as a Gorilla Treestand, which I thought had something to do with hunting gorillas at first glance.
4. Wonder at the amount of products gathered in one place that I would never purchase, such as this fish koozie that Meredith is modeling:
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| She almost makes that look good. Almost. |
6. Avoid getting sprayed by the skunk in the jewelry section.
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| Seriously, Bass Pro Display people? Seriously? |
In conclusion, this is a first I'd like to repeat because someday I hope to be rich and live a life of leisure that includes having my own personal archery range on my sprawling estate. So I'll be needing supplies.
Haha. Delightful. I have never stepped in Bass Pro shop, and even though your experience sounded great, I feel you gave me the best tour through a place I now don't have to step into. But, someday, can I shoot at your archery range?
ReplyDeleteCambria
i will allow you onto my range in exchange for dancing.
DeleteI'm glad you were hoping I would have comments. Because I have oh-so-many.
ReplyDeleteFirstly, that sheep is adorable and I will gladly take up your suggestion of visiting that farm if I get to see adorable baby ducks. Squido will be 6 months next April, it should be a fun outting!
Secondly. Bass Pro. Is Amazing. I am numerically responding to your post, so they correspond to your number bullets above:
1. Pretending to be Katniss is brilliant. However, you left out the even more entertaining part of going to the guns and ammo section. That is where we spend most of our time. You can pretend to shoot the already shot animals and feel like Teddy Roosevelt.
2. Sooo many Jeff Foxworthy jokes, but I'll abstain. Your description of rednecks is fairly apt. Rednecks can also be identified by Big Johnson t-shirts and Skol rings on their jeans. And sometimes a mullet. Or worse, a rat tail.
3. As a country bumpkin, I am able to readily identify most of the items in the store. Speaking of things you probably didn't know you could buy in there, did you know they sell deer pee? And hunters eagerly buy this and douse themselves with it once they get into the field and get into their Gorilla Stands?
4. How else do you expect the expert fisherman to keep his beer cold on his johnboat on a hot summer's day?
5. Dude. Don't knock Cabella's. That is the mark of one fine, sexy country boy. If I were not happily married, I would easily fall for a man in a Cabella's jacket. Or better yet: coveralls. I do love me some country boys.
6. I have nothing for this, except skunk smell will stay on you (or your dog) forEVER. I'm glad you avoided the beast.
7. Best reason to go to Bass Pro, I love the fish! For the record, most of the are large mouth bass.
Also, you can't forget about the camping supplies, the kitschy home decorations, and the BOATS! Ah, I love Bass Pro.
thanks, erin! that was enlightening. and it was also almost like you were speaking a different language. :)
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