anything once: hanging out at bass pro shops

My friend Meredith and I went out for a day o' free fun last Saturday, including a trip to a farm where we met this sheep:

He's behind the fence on the right. He was kind of creepy, hence Eiley's obvious apprehension.

And saw these babies:

There are few things I like more in life than a paddling of ducklings.

Then we headed over to Bass Pro Shops. We found this to be a fascinating anthropological study of redneckitude. It was pretty fun! Top seven things to do at Bass Pro:


1. Head over to the archery section and pretend to be Katniss, obviously.
2. Count rednecks. I only got up to seven and then forgot about this little game, but those seven were defined by camouflage t-shirts, unruly facial hair, and intensely sunburnt cheeks. How do you define a redneck? (Please, keep Foxworthy quotes to a none.)
3. Marvel at the products I never knew existed, such as a Gorilla Treestand, which I thought had something to do with hunting gorillas at first glance.
4. Wonder at the amount of products gathered in one place that I would never purchase, such as this fish koozie that Meredith is modeling:

She almost makes that look good. Almost.

5. Ponder an existence in which one purchases their wardrobe from Bass Pro Shops. Specifically, consider this fictional conversation: "I love your shirt, it's so cute!" "Hey, thanks! I got it at Bass Pro. It was hanging between a bin of meal worms and a bear carcass." 
6. Avoid getting sprayed by the skunk in the jewelry section.

Seriously, Bass Pro Display people? Seriously?

7. Watch the fish in the huge aquarium get fed. This, by the way, was the original reason we came to the store. They have a 19,000 gallon aquarium with a bunch of large fish (I'd tell you what kind but I want to keep that a mystery for you...or I don't know what they were), and it was pretty cool to see them all swarming around trying to get the food. 


In conclusion, this is a first I'd like to repeat because someday I hope to be rich and live a life of leisure that includes having my own personal archery range on my sprawling estate. So I'll be needing supplies.

Movie Review Monday: The Hunger Games (Again)

Jeff had rehearsal last week when I saw Hunger Games, and he made me swear that I would see it a second time with him. We found ourselves with an evening open, a small window of opportunity. We hadn't planned ahead though, so we had to find a babysitter at the last minute. Jeff put out an APB on facebook to see if anyone could do it, and after about an hour, our friend Whitney texted and said she was free. (Actually, after about ten minutes our pastor's wife offered to do it too, but she disclaimered that she'd been sick all week and we didn't want her to have to do any extra work on top of caring for her own three children!)

This was amazing on several levels:

1. Come on. One hour of a status update on facebook, two babysitting offers. Our community here provides excellent customer service.

2. Whitney brought her dog, so Buster was also wholly entertained. 

Buster and Winston are totally BFF.

3. Most importantly, less than one year ago, Whitney was at our baby shower and she held a sleeping baby Rhett. As soon as he woke up, Whitney looked a little uncomfortable and gave him back to his mother and we all laughed about it. But tonight - oh, tonight. Tonight, Whitney willingly gave up her evening to hang out with Eiley. She fed her, changed her, played freaking peekaboo with her! Amazing. Whitney, you are so brave, and I tip my hat to you. Or I salute you. Or something. 

Whitney and Eiley, back when Eiley was still rather fetus-like.

In conclusion, Hunger Games was just as good the second time. I even started to warm to Josh Hutchinson. My three claws remain up.

Movie Review Monday #43: The Hunger Games

Some of you may remember that I jumped on the Hunger Games bandwagon last August. I loved the books. I got to see the film on Friday night, thanks to my sister who watched Eiley. Thoughts, which I will attempt to keep spoiler-free:


1. This was one of the best adaptations I have ever seen. Yes, there were some changes made, but I don't think I'd want to sit through a perfect adaptation since it would probably take about ten hours to include every minute detail. There was only one moment that was not included that disappointed me - I was looking forward to a beautiful symphony of mockingjays after the death of one of the characters. There was no such moment, but that's such a minor complaint. I remember wondering how the filmmakers planned to pass on the information that Katniss, the main character, gives the reader through her inner monologue in the book - they did so mostly with game commentators, one of whom was Cesar Flickerman who was played by Stanley Tucci who I adore. I approved. They also stayed away from turning the film into a love story, which was a concern of mine. There's an aspect of romance to the books, but it's definitely not the focus. Same with the film.
2. Jennifer Lawrence, who plays Katniss, is amazing. She had the perfect balance of strength and realistic fear, I'm impressed with how well she shot the bow and arrow, and she looks very similar to my mental image of Katniss. Good job, Casting Director!

3. A large portion of the film was shot with a shaky cam. I understand that it gave District 12 a gritty, realistic feel, but wow. I could have done with significantly less of that. I felt a bit seasick at times.
4. So I'm already going to take back my compliment to the Casting Director. I can't get over how short and cartoonish Peeta is in the film (my apologies, Josh Hutcherson). In my head, he's tall and strong, with puppy dog eyes and a kind smile. My top three better choices for Peeta: Adam Hicks (though they'd need to make him blonde), Austin Butler (though they'd need to make him less pretty), or Chord Overstreet (who would also need to be deprettified). Full disclosure: I just put way too much imdb effort into that short list, folks. 

5. Here's my big point: I enjoyed the books and the film, but not because they had children killing children. I wish that thought never crossed anyone's mind. I joked about that on facebook (Let's kick off spring by sitting in a dark theater watching teenagers murder each other!), but obviously that's not why I jumped on this bandwagon. Instead, I enjoy this story because it's about a girl who sacrifices her life for her sister, who survives even though the odds are ever not in her favor, who has two boys in love with her but remains humbly oblivious to both, who feeds and cares for her smaller opponent, who stands up for what she believes is right in the only ways she knows how. She's no Jesus, but she's a pretty darn solid literary hero in my opinion. Also, I realize that there are all sorts of socio-political parallels to our world that can be drawn from this series, but I choose to simply place it in the fantasy genre and enjoy it. Call me vapid, I don't care.


In conclusion, three claws up. Solemnly. You know, like they do.

Movie Review Monday #16: Winter's Bone

I promised a more serious movie would be reviewed this week, and boy have I delivered. Winter's Bone could not be more serious. It's basically about a teenager, Ree, who has to find her deadbeat father in order to save the house she shares with the comatose mother and two young siblings she cares for in the Ozarks. I'll be honest - I wanted to watch this film in small part because the star, Jennifer Lawrence, was nominated for an Oscar and I wanted to judge her, but more than that, I wanted to see if she was truly worthy of her next major role, which is the lead in The Hunger Games. You may remember from a previous post that I am slightly obsessed with The Hunger Games, so this should come as no surprise. Observations:


1. Sad, sad, sad. Sad. I pitied Jennifer Lawrence's character. So much responsibility on one girl's shoulders. And with a terrible wardrobe too. Sad.
2. You know when movies or TV shows or books are referred to as "gritty dramas"? Well, this was actually a gritty drama, and not just because the filmmaker used a low-res camera and drab filters. I had to look away at moments because it was so intense. Let's just say there's a scene with a chainsaw and a dead body. 
3. I loved the relationship between Ree and her badass (I'm sorry, but there's no better way to describe him) uncle, Teardrop. Not because it was positive all the time, but because it beautifully evolved throughout the film. She was an intense annoyance to him at the beginning, but by the end, he seemed to understand the importance of their family tie and treated her with some respect. 
4. I've never been to the Ozarks, but everything seemed completely realistic. The people, their living conditions, their pastimes, their vernacular. I felt like I was learning about an American subculture. 
5. Jennifer Lawrence is the perfect choice for Katniss in The Hunger Games. She plays quiet, fierce determination, understated beauty, and a raw need to survive well. 


In conclusion, two claws up, though I will probably never watch this again.

Book(s) Review: The Hunger Games Trilogy

I am obsessed with The Hunger Games trilogy by Suzanne Collins. Seriously. Ask my husband. Every time someone visits, he tells them about the 5 S's to calm a baby (from the book The Happiest Baby on the Block, which we earnestly recommend) and I ask them if they've read The Hunger Games. It has become a joke of sorts (I say "of sorts" because it's not really funny and traditionally jokes are funny - in fact, the more I think about it, the more I think it's kind of sad that we both only have one topic of conversation, but at least we don't talk about the color of Eiley's poop or anything). I even asked our friend Chad if he'd read them twice in one week. 


Arabella let me borrow her Kindle, so I was able to read the entire trilogy while nursing Eiley. Amazing. Sometimes I would tell Eiley to just keep eating if I was finishing a chapter. Things I loved about The Hunger Games:

1. They were super addictive, like Twilight, but I didn't feel like my brain was turning to mush because it was so horribly written, unlike Twilight. This was well written and a page turner.
2. The characters were interesting and memorable and not entirely predictable.
3. The main character, Katniss, has two potential love interests to choose from. She can't choose, but neither could I. Seemed more realistic this way. Like 90s one hit wonder Natalie Imbruglia, I was torn.
4. These are fantasy novels, which I don't normally go for because I'm generally too lazy to learn about a whole new world (for example, I couldn't make it through the Lord of the Rings books with all their lands and different creatures and terminology and Gollum). I found it easy to jump into this world, which is really our world but in the future and slightly altered. The names were unconventional but not difficult to remember or pronounce and the lore was clearly communicated and easy to follow. 
5. I was on the edge of my glider chair much of the time. This is a story of survival, hope, freedom, unintentional heroism and awesome costumery. 
6. Katniss's weapon of choice is the bow and arrow, which is also my weapon of choice! 
7. The movie comes out next year, and I'm a sucker for books that are adapted. 

Two enthusiastic claws up, Lobsters! Read The Hunger Games today! (Or I'll ask you if you've read them bi-weekly until you do!)