Paul Tough is Cool Part 3: Still Nerdy

I was getting carried away with my interest in Paul Tough's recent talk the other day, so I thought I'd save my other thoughts for this post, just to spread things out a little. Here I go, nerdying out a little bit more, then I'll try to be done. Promise.

As I was saying . . .

Point the second. In response to his comments about a study done on baby rats [I believe this may be the study, or at least one related to what he discussed] where they've found that certain genes actually switch on and off based on whether the mama rat licks and strokes the baby rat in the first seven days of life, one woman asked about a related study that seemed to indicate that the administration of certain chemicals could have a similar effect on the rats' brains as the nurturance. I believe the answer was yes. And certainly, as someone who wishes that a pill would switch certain genes of my own on or off at times, and as someone who has seen the devastating effects of abuse and neglect and has wished a simple switch could heal people I care for, this is a hopeful breakthrough. And still, my heart sank a bit at the swiftness with which we would seek out a chemical to replace the love and care of a healthy relationship. Of course, creating healthy relationships is infinitely harder, but isn't it also infinitely more useful and effective? Even if a pill could reverse the brain damage caused by abuse, does that pill also surround that brain with a model of how to love, how not to pass on more failed relational interactions? How can we encourage a culture obsessed with instant gratification to choose the much much harder road in this instance??

And perhaps to that point, and to make my last point, in considering how to help children succeed, Tough contrasted studies about language development with studies about Attachment. I believe he was trying to help us shift our understanding of how to define success (the harder road worth taking, if you will)
. And yet, the whole way through, I was so certain he was building up to a point I don't think he ever made [though, my brain isn't exactly functioning on all cylinders, so perhaps I missed it, or perhaps we're supposed to wait for his book to see it]. I had seen glimpses of studies here and there [I believe this one gets at the point] that show that healthy attachment actually has a powerful effect on language development. Had he come to this as his climax, he might have helped us think about relational competence and stress management as the more valuable skills, but shown us how better language development is the cherry on top gained when you order your priorities correctly. Personally, I thought that would have been pretty cool. But his talk was still cool nonetheless.

I'm really sorry if this makes no sense because you probably were not at this talk with me, but maybe you're getting a glimpse into some interesting research studies/ideas I've found interesting. I would certainly love to engage on these questions with anyone who is interested! Comment away, Lobsters!

Paul Tough is cool Part 2: Getting Nerdy

So as I mentioned recently, I got to hear Paul Tough talk about how cool Attachment Theory. Paul Tough + Attachment = a double score in my book. If you're interested in a little sample of Tough's writings, check out this article. As I also mentioned, I was too nervous to ask any questions or make any comments in the public space after the talk, and only barely got up the guts to approach him directly. My thoughts were a bit insecure and a bit nerdy, getting into research studies I felt vaguely familiar with. If I had had more chutzpah, here are a few of the things I would have wanted to engage on:

First of all, if you don't know about Emmy Werner, you haven't had too much of a conversation with me about children or education. I'm enthralled by her work. So because that's probably true of most people reading this post, I'm gonna tell you about her now. Werner did a 32 year longitudinal study in Hawaii of children born in various circumstances, from wealthy to poor, two parents and none, homes with drug abuse or substance free, etc. [ Emmy Werner's work on Resilience.] After she sorted the babies born according to degrees of risk factors [like poverty, single parents, substance abuse], she found that a significant portion of the high-risk children actually grew up to be "competent and caring adults." Or in other words, despite being born into rough circumstances, the majority of those children were resilient. She found three protective factors that lead to resilience:

1)  Presence of a Caring Adult [Certainly consistent with attachment theory! But if not the mother, someone like a teacher or a coach or youth pastor can certainly play this roll]

2) High Expectations

3) Meaningful Opportunities [such as community service or leadership]

Her studies are certainly much more involved, but that's the nutshell as it's been taught to me. Isn't that inspiring and hopeful? Aren't those things as a community that we should be able to provide children? Even, and especially, children who may not have had positive attachments until they get exposed to a broader community, such as through a school. So cool. I think her study should be required knowledge for anyone working with children!

More later . . .

Take a seat

Alright folks, I haven't been getting much good sleep lately, and I don't get to the computer until well after the window where my creative brain is still functioning lately, so you're getting a weird post today, but I need some answers, so I'm putting it out there. 

Every week, I get a smattering of emails from various services telling me about my toddler's development. I learn all sorts of things to look for, like first words, sudden fears of bathtubs, and such. That's how I knew to smile and nod recently when she started becoming obsessed with getting in and out of furniture. Totally normal new skill apparently, and a pretty cute one in my opinion. 

See, here is Sofia mastering her little rocking chair (and blowing a kiss at the same time):

And here's the afternoon when we went around the porch and she asked me to help her in and out of each and every chair out there, over and over again. As soon as she'd plopped down in one, she was pointing to another. 

Ok, fine. That's all well and good. But I need someone who knows something more about child development to explain to me why exactly she's so obsessed with sitting on things? I'm not talking about getting in and out of furniture anymore. I'm talking about exploring the world with the tool of her bum.  She sees a jacket lying around, the spreads it out on the floor, turns around, backs up, and plops down on it. Maybe she lies back and makes a few jacket-angles, gets back up, and does it again. Here she is one afternoon pulling cookie sheets and racks out of my cabinets so she could sit on those: 

How do little brains work?? It feels like every few weeks her brain must check for updates and receive new directives. "Current mission assignment : find object, sit on said object, repeat." It's not the first mission directive I've witnessed her accept. In the olden days, she had phases where she was doing compulsive crunches day and night for weeks. That eventually lead to sitting up, and rock-hard-baby-abs, which was cool. Even motivated me to do a few more crunches than I would have otherwise (which would have been none). So I'm curious to know what this one is all about. 

For now, I'm just witnessing the sitting-obsession and waiting to see how it plays out. I was doing just that the other night, but got bored, so I decided we needed to do some tumbling together. I started to show her how to do summersaults. She was super into it, eyes all wide. It was a blast. She was laughing, I was laughing, we were having a grand old time. And then when I'd tuckered myself out, I just sprawled out on the floor, laying on my back explaining to her, "Mommy's tired!" when she backed it up and sat right on my face. I no longer find it simply curious, I find it hilarious, and I really want someone to explain what's going on to me!  Any Lobsters out there that can help me out? 

P.S. Hey Emily - remember in college how we named our dorm room, "The Sitting Room" and spent a summer collecting chairs/couches/and making our own pillows? Maybe Sofia just wants to fit in to our club and show me she has superior sitting skilz?!