Long Distance Daddy

Two months ago [I'm a bit behind on blogging about life with all that's going on!], Sofia and I survived our first week without Manny, a.k.a. "Daddy." He was at a conference in Scotland. Other than being totally jealous, it was not the easiest week of our lives. But I knew it wouldn't be, so I prepared. I had just gotten over a bout of mastitis, which really knocked me out. I was afraid of it coming back while he was away and Sofia suffering from the lack of a single capable care provider. So I lined up helpers. 

For the first night, I had Manny's mother stay with me. It is not too hard to convince the grandmother to spend a little time with her first grand baby! Let me tell you a little thing about Nora. You know how annoying it is when people leave a toilet paper roll empty in the bathroom? Nora replaces the roll before its too close to being empty and leaves the old roll on top so as not to let it go to waste. I think that's a pretty good micro-example of the kind of person this woman is. I am so thankful for her! 

We spent one night alone, which I was afraid of, but actually ended up being a total treat of some one on one Mommy-daughter time. Then my dear friend Erin arrived. I knew what I would need most with Manny away was someone who helps me to be calm and relaxed so that I can care for Sofia and help her to stay calm and relaxed. Erin ALWAYS delivers on this account, as she did when she stayed with us this week. 

With many hours of tea and talk, we caught up on life, explored ideas, encouraged one another, and recounted great memories. We also managed to get out on the town and enjoy ourselves, including our day at Point Loma. Instead of feeling strung out and lonely, Erin helped me feel renewed and comforted.

Sofia's first viewing of Little Women
appropriately took place with Erin in the room.
Please note she was well prepared, with tissue in hand!

That said, there are elements of caring for an infant I just couldn't ask Erin to help with, but that Manny does help with every day. Well, actually, every "night" I should say. I think Sofia must have really missed her daddy, because she was getting up tons in the night all that week, even though she had been sleeping through the nights just fine up until that point. I can not deny that this was rough. Manny might have gotten more than one mid-night email from me, moaning about his absence. 

One night was particularly rough. After a couple of hours of trying to get Sofia back down to sleep, I was on the floor in the living room, sweating from the heat and distress, and I just eventually broke down into tears. I looked into my restless, fussing, baby girl's eyes and begged her to calm down and go to sleep for Mama. And what do you know? She did. Right that instant. She calmed, looked back into my eyes with a knowing intensity, and she closed her eyes and slept the rest of the night. 

Manny's gals missed him. Even besides needing him around, we wanted him around. So for the first time, we had some family Skype time. Manny didn't have a chance to forget how cute his daughter was and he didn't have to miss out on the week where she really started to sit up well on her own. Thank heavens for technology! After Erin left, we had another couple of nights and days to ourselves, but were thrilled for Daddy to come home. 

So my advice to any new mothers with baby daddy's leaving town? Skype it up, ask for help, and pace yourself. I'm sure you Lobsters have some more advice for the next time Sofia and I are on our own. Have you had any good or bad experiences?  

Skype shots by Daddy

Snapshot Saturday #3: the shot that started it all

Sophomore year of college. First photography class. Assignment: portraits. I asked my buddy, Nate, if I could use him as a subject. Not only did I get an enthusiastic "sure," but also, he brought along a whole group of friends. I told them to gather up some props and come to the Armington lawn. One by one they sat awkwardly for me while I danced around the polite sphere of personal space. Jon used someone's guitar as a prop, but held it backwards - not knowing any better, making for some comical shots. Then you sat down.

You grabbed the same guitar. Not only did you know how to hold it, you knew how to play. You began to mess around with some little jazzy improv-y chord progressions. I lost site of the sphere of personal space all together. You drew me in and I was entranced. I don't think I even realized what I was doing. I've always wondered what you were thinking as my lens got right up in your face.

Later that evening, I spent a few hours alone in the dark room. That's when it really hit me. As the shot of you developed and I saw that image coming into view in that red light, a powerful, visceral rush of excitement/butterflies/awe/joy rushed over me. Bam! It was like I got hit by a truck that was my-intense-crush-on-you. Full on twitter-pated.

You looked so mysterious. I wanted to discover what that mystery was all about. I needed any excuse to see you again as soon as possible. I rushed down the hill to your dorm, only to find your room darkened with multiple girls snuggled up on your couch. But you weren't on that couch. You were on the bunk above them, from which you jumped down faster than I could finish knocking on your door. I was almost too overwhelmed and nervous to know what to say. "Uh, I finished developing the photos. It took a few tries to get it quite right for the assignment. I thought your mom might want some pictures of you or something." And she knew right away. On your next visit home, when you handed her those prints, she knew better than even I did how completely smitten I was with you. She could see it in the shot. Smart lady.

Here we are. Six years ago today, we got married.

I still love this shot.

I love that I got to capture and preserve the exact moment that my heart fell in love with you.

I love that I'm still enthralled with discovering your mystery.

I love that the power with which those feelings hit me as your image developed was just the smallest glimpse of the way I feel about you today, as if our love is ever-developing and coming more fully into view.

I love you, Manny.

Happy Anniversary my dear husband.