a tiger, an imaginary armadillo, and balloon poop

Once upon a time (and by that I mean today), Arabella came to town from New Jersey to keep me company and help with Eiley while Jeff was out of town. To celebrate her safe arrival, I took her to Texas Roadhouse. It ended up being the weirdest dining experience of my recent life. Proof:


1. Our waitress was in a foul mood. When we sat down, she started apologizing profusely for the table not being wiped, which we hadn't even noticed, and muttered something about the hostesses being bad at their jobs. She then suggested a bunch of different drink options, looking like she was might cry the whole time she rattled off the list. 


2. There was a group of eight older women at the table next to ours celebrating a birthday. They asked their waitress to take their picture, and in order to get the full shot, she sat down and scooted next to me in my booth.


3. Arabella put a napkin on Eiley's head and Eiley left it there for several minutes. She looked like a mini flying nun, and the aforementioned older ladies apparently thought it was the cutest thing they'd ever seen. Ever. One of them grabbed our grumpy waitress's arm as she was walking by and emphatically reprimanded her, "You need to stop, and appreciate, the cuteness of that baby right there." 


4. We were there on Kid's Night, which we didn't know existed. A balloon artist came by the older ladies' table and offered to make the birthday girl a balloon animal. He didn't mention what he was making as he pulled out a brown balloon and started twisting it into thick knots. They all start giggling, and one said "I don't know where he's going with this, but the brown balloon makes me think it's not going to be good." She thought it would be poop. It was a monkey. 


5. Balloon Guy came to our table. He asked if we'd seen the giant armadillo wandering around. We hadn't. We later heard him ask another table if they'd seen the giant armadillo. They hadn't either. We searched the restaurant for the giant armadillo before leaving, and it was no where to be found. Therefore, Balloon Guy clearly had an imaginary giant armadillo.

Balloon Guy made this "dog" for Eiley. Arabella found it suspicious.

6. Balloon Guy informed us that summer is not a good season to take balloons outside. With the confidence of a college professor lecturing a class, he told us, "Don't even waste your time waiting in line for a balloon during the summer if you're outside. That thing will not last." Noted.


7. While Balloon Guy stood next to us, a child approached and asked him to fix her balloon. Her face was painted to look like a tiger, though it also kind of looked like she'd recently taken part in some kind of disturbing tribal war ceremony.


8. By the end of the evening, our grumpy waitress had turned into just a slightly awkward waitress. She admitted that she had been telling all her co-workers to come see the cute baby at our table. She then noticed that Arabella was feeding Eiley sweet potato with a fork and she practically Dobbied herself for not bringing a spoon for the baby.


9. The rolls were not warm, pillowy pockets of deliciousness. If you've ever been to Texas Roadhouse, you know that this is also super weird. And if you know me, you know that this point is only being made to keep the list odd.


In conclusion, I found the evening exceedingly entertaining and gave a generous tip to thank slightly awkward waitress for the dinner and theater.

Eating With Zoe

Have I mentioned that I like to eat? Cause I like to eat. Perhaps you've enjoyed the little "Cooking with Zoe" posts I've done in the past. Today, I'm thinking about the places I like to go where other people cook for me. I mostly cook at home, so eating out is a special treat. Whenever we have seasons where we get a little more breathing room in our budget, the eating out category is the first to find some elbow room. We've just moved to a new town with new restaurants to explore.

We were so excited this weekend to find our first restaurant-we-love in Maine, Shere Punjab. Chicken Tikka Masala and Lamb Curry - our signature Indian restaurant orders - were almost too spicy for me to handle, but so worth the heat. We were the ONLY people in the restaurant through our whole meal, despite the town being packed for an arts festival. We couldn't understand why no one else was in there, but we enjoyed the space, quiet, and service!

This has me thinking about all the cities I've lived in and the restaurants I miss. I have woken up several mornings knowing I'm home sick because I start to look forward to going to one restaurant or another as the weekend approaches, problem is, those restaurants are in other parts of the country now. BUT! perhaps you live in these cities, perhaps you will visit them sometime, or perhaps you share my longings for restaurants now inaccessible to you. I happen to like quite a few restaurants, so in order not to overwhelm you, I'll break this up into a scattered little series. If you're ever in my old stomping grounds and need a recommendation, please consider a few of Zoe's [a non-foodie food lover] faves. [note: if you are one of these restaurants or would like to become one of these restaurants, yes I will consider writing for food ;) ]

To begin, let us consider Houston, Texas, my home town. A visit here might earn you the consolation prize of a nice night/morning/day out to eat. Here are some of my top choices:

#1: Goode Company BBQ. ["Goode Co."] This is the standard against which I judge ALL barbeque in the world. This is what Texas barbeque means to me. Smoky, tasty, melt in your mouth goodness. This is where my dad would take me for our lunch break in the middle of a hot, sweaty day working in the yard. We'd sit out on their porch at the picnic tables, letting the fans and root bear transform our dripping foreheads into cool relaxation. For both sentimental and gustatorial reasons, this is probably my favorite restaurant in the world.

#2: Amazon/America's/Artista/Churasco's. I don't visit too many towns with South American food options, but was spoiled growing up with this family of restaurants. I was also spoiled by the fact that my father did their food photography, so we often got to eat there for free. Fried plantain chips, chimichurri sauce, churasco steak. My mouth is watering just thinking about it. This was where my dad took me on my birthday daddy-daughter dates growing up, this is where Manny and I had our engagement party, and it's always on my list for must-visit when I'm in town.

#3: Hobbit Hole. Love Tolkein? Love earthy food? Love to feel so full you might burst without even having to eat second breakfast and elevensies? Never before has a themed-restaurant been so non-cheesy and super-yummy at the same time. Their onion rings are killer [though, perhaps a meal in themselves] and a wonderful proportion of their menu includes almost overwhelming gobs of avocado [as if there could be any such thing as too much avocado! hence the word "almost"]. It is also tucked away from any main streets, so you have the perk of eating at a "hole" in the wall of sorts ;). When you eat here, you can feel gluttonous, but so literary and brilliant at the same time.

Hmmm . . . as I read over this I'm realizing there is a theme of emotional ties related to my father with these restaurants [the Hobbit Hole was one of our favorite lunch spots in the middle of a business day whenever I worked at his studio]. My mother was such a gourmet in the kitchen, I guess he cornered the restaurant market in my emotions. 

Ok, I feel like I put on a few thousand calories just thinking about these places. Houston is not a great town to go to if you are on a diet - except for the fact that you'll look around and most likely feel like the skinny one, so that can be encouraging. We'll save some more drooling for another day. In the mean time - please chime in! If our readers are visiting Houston, where do YOU think they should grab a bite to eat?