You’ve done it.

Dear Fazakerley's,

Three years ago, you left home, the place you loved and never wanted to leave, and set out on this adventure. Jeff, you stepped out with courage, with aspirations that may have drawn funny looks from some. Emily, you stepped out in faith that Jeff could actually make a go of acting. You both took a big step.

It was a scary step. You weren’t thrilled about leaving California. You weren’t 100% confident in yourself that you could see the program through to completion. But you felt called to this place for a purpose. And you both went.

How does a young married couple get by on one income while paying for grad-school tuition? How does a young husband give of his heart fully on the stage and to his studies, and still preserve his truest love for his wife? How does a young wife weather theater-widowhood, and yet hold onto love and commitment for her living breathing theater-husband?

Overwhelming to some, apparently this was not challenge enough for you, so you invited another pioneer into your mix. You weren’t sure you could do that either, juggle marriage, work, grad-school, AND a newborn baby. But you did it. 

You took time to make birthdays and anniversaries special. You gave your all to your work. You took advantage of opportunities to get away for breaks. You allowed your community in to support and bolster you. You cared for your community in return. You sacrificed for one another. You sacrificed for Eiley. You loved.

You did it all. You accomplished your goal despite unforeseen challenges. You lived and loved well with the time that you had there, as I’m sure many Virginian-friends can attest. And now you’ve flown home to California.

I imagine you’re a bit changed by the journey. You now have an extra degree under your belt, an extra person in your arms, and maybe at least the tiniest bit less of your heart, left behind in Virginia.

And now you face a new challenge of settling back in to a place that is familiar. But you have changed. You may be more changed, Jeff, than when you left Idaho to go to school in California. You may be more changed, Emily, then when you went abroad to Spain. You are more, both in quantity and quality, than when you left.

There will be accommodations to procure, routines to establish, new networks to ease into. My fear is that the newness of the old will keep you from taking a moment to realize all you’ve accomplished. It must be both exciting and scary to be home. But when you get back to In-N-Out, because I knew it would have only take a matter of minutes for you to find you way there, I hope you’ll raise your Diet Coke, forgive it for not being a Diet Pepsi, and give a toast to yourselves, because you’ve done it. You’ve gone there and come back again. You should be so proud.

Jeffrey, congratulations on your graduation.

Emily, congratulations on your good work at Regent, your beautiful superhuman mothering of your daughter, and your selfless support of your husband through this season.

Eiley, congratulations on surviving your first round of grad school.

Fazakerley’s, congratulations on your return home. 

Flashback! The twelfth.

Here's a flashback in print form, Lobsters! Postcards Zoe sent to me from her travels:

Toscana!

Sri Lanka!

Dear Emily,

Dear Emily,

Why thank you for your blog-letter! I loved hearing all about your life. There is so much that falls between the cracks, even as much as we try to stay in touch. It is a relief to know some of these delightful tidbits can be salvaged.

Do you ever just wonder what is going through Eiley’s mind as you read to and play with her? What do you sing with her? Does she have a favorite song? Sofia has always been a surprising fan of the ABC’s, and Manny has a magical ability to put her asleep with “Hush Little Baby.” I hear the later so often that I meditate on its meaning and implications way too much.  I’ll probably have to write a blog post about it some day.

Sofia is saying “Mama” a lot lately and it is the highlight of my life.

Instead of plants and flamingos, you should just focus on what you already do so well and build your gnome collection. Did you ever see that Gnomeo and Juliet movie?

I remember random things and use those memories to develop an odd list of life-goals/dreams. One of them is for you to have a white picket fence some day. I’m sure I probably made awkward threats to Jeff while y’all were engaged that involved him promising to make this happen for you. I’m glad you are getting closer, who knows, I could die at any moment, what with the wild meese and falling snow and fire-red clawed creatures roaming all about around here.

I am very sorry that Jennifer Johnson didn’t do it for you. I also judge books by their covers. This often means I purchase pretty ones, but I apparently do not have such luck as you, and so there are a lot of pretty books on my shelves, but a whole different collection of books I have actually enjoyed. What is going to happen to cover design in a world of iTunes and eReaders?!?! Tragic.

I am in a book club for the first time in my life. I hated the first two books we read, but rather enjoyed the most recent one we discussed. It was called The Imperfectionists. It was about a newspaper in Rome or more thematically, about the evolution of journalism over the past several decades. My family never subscribed the paper when I was growing up, so I find journalism and newsprint to be an exotic art form, not in the least bit discouraged by Dave Eggers The Panoramic. Are you familiar with that? I texted you the night I heard him speak about it at Berkeley, fascinating. But I’m getting carried away on this topic so I should move on.

Please do away with your shame because I LOVED Drop Dead Diva. I believe I may have recommended it to you several months ago? Lol. I also recently discovered a male version of the show with the love interest from the movie version of Mansfield park. It is called “Eli Stone” and it is available on Netflix Watch Instant.  It has the dad from Alias doing lots of song and dance numbers. Eat your heart out.

I can only imagine how amazing Jenna is with Eiley. Y’all are so blessed to have each other and get to be close by. Jenna is just an amazing human being! I am so anxious for Thanksgiving because that means my sister is coming to visit. I keep getting so excited at the thought of her seeing Sofia for the first time since July, because I feel like EVERYTHING has changed for Sofia since then. Lauren is not going to recognize her.

I have indeed played Bananagrams and when I did I thought, “Emily would love this!” I, as you know, am a horrendous speller, therefore I am not a huge fan but enjoy playing it for the sake of the people I play with.

Bah! No diaper bag?!? Disasterous! I kind of hate my diaper bag and wouldn’t mind an opportunity to change things up, but would totally freak if I lost all its contents. I hope you didn’t lose anything too valuable.

Um, wow. Christian swingers party?!?! You and your parties, amazing. This should be an ongoing series on our blog because you are part of the most creative parties I ever hear of. Also, you as Olive Oyl iis just so perfect. I love it! And the fact that you can pull that off so soon post-pregnancy deserves a big kudos, way to go!

I haven’t been to any parties that come close to that one lately. But we did participate in this town Halloween parade. It was so awesome. It took me back to my own childhood when we would decorate our bikes for Fourth of July and have a city-wide parade around the entire city. [the “city” I lived in was about eight blocks deep and one block wide] Here, all the kids in town [and several more brave parents] dressed up, gathered in the town green, and followed the high school marching band a few blocks around to the Rec center. We saw most people we know in town and I got to meet the dads of all these mommy/baby pairs I’m getting to know. So much cute stimulation. It wore us all out, but it was great fun!

I was checking out Sandy Kay Salsbury’s blog [http://viewfromtheroadsofar.blogspot.com/] and am playing around with the idea of doing the Nanowrimo [http://www.nanowrimo.org/]. Didn’t you do that a few years back? I should probably be more committed from day one, but we’ll see. Anyways – thanks for giving me lots to write about with your lovely post!

Talk to you soon! Lahve!