- Well, hello scrolly exposition. I knew I'd see you again.
- Dooku is a funny name.
- Senator. Count. Queen. I feel like we're mixing governments here.
- I like that shiny spaceship.
- Well, maybe there's SOME danger.
- Whoa that chick just had the most abrupt death scene ever.
- I'm so confused already. Wasn't Natalie a Queen before? Did she get demoted?
- Aw geez. Jar Jar.
- What the Rose Byrne?
- Why hasn't Yoda learned proper English syntax? And what was his first language?
- What happened to Hayden Christenson?
- "I haven't seen Amidala in years, Master...and I'm totally crushing."
- Why hasn't Amidala aged?
- Annie is a prideful little Jedi.
- She didn't forget you completely. She knew your name, Annie. Did you want her to swoon or something?
- That strapless eye patch is stylin'.
- Can you sense that Amidala is eavesdropping, hotshot?
- Whoa, Annie isn't tiptoeing around his crush. "She's intoxicating." Calm down, dude.
- Ew. Millipede wormy things.
- Locate them, R2D2!
- Safe!
- Ewan diving out the window! What's the plan here, Ewan?!
- Ugh. It's Jedis like him who cause rush hour traffic.
- Shot down! Somehow I'm not at all worried for him.
- Yep, Annie caught him.
- Annie is NUTS.
- Electrocution? No big deal.
- "What's the point of this?" - Erik. Amen, Erik. Amen.
- Man, Jedis LOVE jumping out of things.
- I'm really growing to love the "pyew! pyew! pyew!" blaster sound effect.
- Is a Jedi's light saber like a wizard's wand in that it's specific to its owner?
- Now they're just running. That seems beneath them somehow.
- Are Ewan's eyes really that green?
- Ooo Jedi therapist - "go home and rethink your life."
- Did he just cut off her arm?!
- Does the light saber cauterize the wound automatically?
- Diagonal fade!
- That's a cute hover chair, Yoda.
- Annie has too much pressure and too much power.
- Ha. Amidala: "Jar Jar - I don't wish to hold you up." That was a diplomatic way of telling him to shut up.
- Whoa, Annie went from "He's a good master, don't get me wrong" to pouting and ranting like a petulant child.
- More like "Please don't LEER at me like that," am I right?
- Jedi poncho!
- I like this amiable diner alien.
- Robot waitress looks exactly like Rosie from the Jetsons.
- Fun fact: My eighth grade Algebra teacher was Mr. Parsek.
- Coolest. Library. Ever.
- Oh, Yoda. Making jokes about losing a planet. You're hilarious.
- OH. Explanation of not being Queen anymore. Thanks, guys.
- Are they bickering in front of the current Queen? Awkward.
- I briefly just wondered where Captain Eo fits in with all this.
- Super long neck Camino alien is lovely!
- Oh, come on, Amidala. You are totally crushing back.
- What if he's using his Jedi mind powers to make her kiss him?! That cad!
- Clones!
- When did she costume change? I liked her Xanadu dress; now she's all hippie.
- The hills are aliiiiive with the sound of...no chemistry!
- Oh no, he fell off the giant potato cow!
- They are literally rolling around in the grass.
- Kid, that's not your dad...he's your...your...what do you call the relationship between you and your young clone?
- This scene is tense and I have NO idea what's happening.
- Uh-oh. Firelight and a heaving bosom. Just get this over with.
- Homeboy is SO CLINGY. He just keeps talking! No, you're tormenting US, Annie.
- "I wish that I could wish away..." Well, that seems like lazy writing.
- Are Jedi robes waterproof?
- If Amidala really wanted to stop this relationship, she wouldn't wear that.
- That's some awesome jumpkicking, Ewan!
- Why is he always falling?
- Those blue charges are AWESOME.
- I would love to know how they created all these sound effects.
- Just shoot out some spare parts and that will solve it. How anticlimactic.
- 30 men went looking for your mom already, but sure - you have a go at it too.
- The Count looks like the "He chose...poorly" knight from Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade.
- Poor Mama! Now that was a proper death scene.
- Oh, he's raging.
- Ooo...Imperial Death March subtly playing as Yoda talks about Anakin.
- Anakin's not available right now, Ewan.
- Where does Amidala store all these giant clothes that she wears?
- Single-handed genocide of the Tuskans. Tsk, tsk.
- Amidala is so sassy.
- I am SO sleepy.
- Darth Sidious. The Sith. Why does everything sound vaguely like an STD?
- Holy cow. Will we have to sit through an actual clone war still?! Interminable film!
- Alien robowasp attack!
- Padme would win everything on that show Wipeout!
- R2 is so much smarter than C3P0.
- Decapitated C3P0!
- How is her outfit still so white?!
- "I truly...deeply..." - Amidala "...madly?" - Erik
- Uf. That is an ugly language.
- Ah, another unnecessary alien monster parade. George Lucas is just showing off.
- Can't they just Jedi fly away from this arena?
- I think Amidala just got scratched so we could see some midriff.
- Oh, please. We did not have time for that smooch.
- I'm fairly impressed by the lack of chemistry between Annie and Amidala. It's like watching two marionettes pretend to be in love.
- GET IT, Samuel L!
- Decapitated Fett!
- They are flirting on the battlefield. Flirting.
- "This is such a drag." GROAN.
- Yoda and a clone army! Just in the nick of time!
- War. Fighting. Explosions. Etc, etc.
- Death Star schematics!
- That is the least manly vehicle ever, Count. It looks like a hover Vespa.
- I wish Natalie would put a whole shirt on. I'm trying to enjoy ice cream and she's making me want to do sit-ups instead.
- I'm expecting a big fight from the Count. OH, SNAP. He did not disappoint.
- Double light saber!
- Back down to one!
- Arm cut off!
- YODA FIGHT?!
- That is one angry Muppet.
- How does everyone keep saying Dooku without giggling?!
- Bahahahaha this is the most adorable light saber fight ever.
- I knew that dude was bad.
- "Begun the Clone War has." Dear Lord, I hope it's actually the end of this film though. I need to go to bed.
- Mawwiage. Pretty dress! Pretty lame kiss!
- He's smiling and she looks like "what have I done?"
In conclusion, this movie was long, tedious, confusing, and lacked the endearing qualities of the original two that I've seen. Oh, hey, that was my conclusion from Episode I as well. I did thoroughly enjoy the fight between Dooku and Yoda though - it almost made it worth watching. Almost. Also, I now understand why we haven't seen much of Hayden Christenson, bless his heart. Perfect teeth will only get you so far in Hollywood.
